tisdag 1 mars 2011

Spring-Clean Attempts

It´s March and we need to spring-clean them brains!

Where to start? Where to start?

I could give you some advice, but as life move along I´m leaning away from that sort of behaviour as it seems to enhance the amount of guilt in people´s lives, not the amount of quality.

Recipes? You want recipes? I bought fenugreek in an enthusiastic attempt to become more apt at African cooking. So far, well, we´ll just have to see -- strange can become delicious! I have other recipes, I have written down things I actually know how to make, but ah bleh sudden loss of interest...

Writing then. Nothing I can teach you, but we can always inspire each other. Some time ago I submitted four very short stories to ”Short, Fast and Deadly”. I was fairly certain at least some of them would be accepted, but they all got rejected and I got disappointed. So. Silly. I thought I´d moved beyond that, but no. Well, I applied one of my favourite strategies on this situation: I rearranged reality to better fit my needs.

This is what I came up with: the editor, a sensitive, real artistic guy, read my work and was so taken in by my talent he found it unbearable. Therefore, he had some wine, got thoroughly pissed and when he woke up the next morning my writing was gone! Vanished! From real life and his computer. Oh, the tragedy! The poor man now roams the Earth, starved and pale, glass shoe in hand, in search of me and my awesome work -- he can´t live without any of us! This is now how I remember it, yes it is! Fixed memory!

Whaddya mean? ”What about the rejection email?” Get with the story line, people! He was drunk and completely beside himself! Jeez…

I don´t think the stories really fit anywhere else though (with that very specific S, F & D rule they can´t be more than 420 characters) so here they are. Maybe they can be of some input use to some of you:

Power Dreams
On my lampshade there´s a pattern of dragonflies. So pretty those creatures; nicely shaped and completely symmetrical. As I fall asleep they come alive and I imagine myself reaching out for their fragile bodies and picking them, one by one. I collect them into a bouquet, their shimmering wings flutter helplessly as I put them in a vase. Now wouldn´t they make a master piece on any fancy old dinner table?

Tentacle Love
He´s got a very special talent; he can grow as many arms as he likes. He´s holding me tightly against himself, my bum against his erection, and I mold myself after him as he parts my labia, pinches my nipples, fists my hair. More arms; I suck on his finger as I offer him my wrists to hold, secure, restrain. He brings me off with the talents of a god and if, in the end, he happens to strangle me, I won´t object.

Nothing´s cleaner than the first snow. In spring, she planted marigold by the stones in his backyard. They laughed and kissed. Her tomatoes grew during summer; she served them with mozzarella and he thought maybe, just maybe. Come fall she harvested carrots, silent and angry. The frost bruised the rest, like he bruised her. She said she´d leave but he put her where she belonged -- in his pure winter garden.

Family Photos
There´s a reluctance in the way he regards the world. ”You have to accept it for what it is!” she laughs, and frames her photos. Family photos. His smile is always forced and she laughs again, condescending, when she watches it.

In the last photo he takes of her she´s lying still on the floor, a pale beauty with hair drenched in red. He thinks she finally communicates some truth. He didn´t know she had it in her.

Bim, tiddely pom, tralla la la la… Oh, you still here? Very sweet of you! Let me share one thing: there´s a woman with a music project called ”Hello Saferide”. She´s from my hometown and you might not like the music or you might get really annoyed with her for having an accent (much like my own I imagine) but if you can see beyond that, I really think she´s got some special talent when it comes to writing. And she´s serious about it, which makes her a kindred spirit and an inspiration because she actually does this for a living. And she gets it out there, even if some of it isn´t correct or perfect… Her Swedish writing is more nuanced of course, but we can´t share that so… Bla bla bla "Hello Saferide", lyrics. Check it out if you want to.

And Becky, this is for you! The first photo ever taken of me as I arrived here!

You do know I´m taking you with me when I leave, don´t you? Your talent is expected elsewhere =)

2 kommentarer:

  1. "Hello, Saferide" -- she had me at There is a town that I live in and it’s a town that favors winners and when I win I think about when I’ll next lose. The only problem? I want to hear her voice. When you know someone wrote something to be said aloud (did you read Aidan's romp in the lettuce patch in this week's Prediction? Begs to be acted out), you must hear the author's voice. But what if that ruins it? As hearing mine would. I'll content myself with just lyrics, then -- for now.

    Also, if you come over, I'll let you be Gabor in the lettuce patch.

    AH, the 420s! How I have missed them! No, not really. I wrote a lot of them, and deliberately avoided them afterwards. Would they be better than my book? No, it wasn't that. Just that I hurt my brain trying to write that many. Yours are the first I've read since last summer, and I'm glad. Especially for Tentacle Love, of course.

    I think no one will be surprised at the darkness you can meld into 420 characters, though I was at Perfect. Why? I don't know. The beautiful imagery, of things I might want for myself -- except for that last part, you know.

    Love the pic. I'm not ready to leave here yet, though. These humans need help. They need more porn.

  2. The meaning of life: bring more porn to the humans.

    Well, it´s not the worst I´ve come across =)


    Oh, I´d love to do some reading! To act some texts! Would love to!